A Tropical Afternoon Tea

One afternoon when a mild monsoon Blew over the tropical sea, On the ocean strand of a sandy land They gave a Tropical Tea.

O, O, who could foresee All the beasts there would be at a Tropical Tea? In a monsoony land, With a Tropical Band. O, who could foresee?

Every lady beast attended the feast With the lady birds so fair; But the Whale and the Eel were sure they would feel Quite out of their element there.

O, O, think of an Eel! With a squirming disgust that she couldn’t conceal! Nothing wet but the tea, Far away from the sea. O, think of the Eel!

A truce for the day kept the beasts of prey From eating a handy guest; So the Tiger was there and the timid Hare,-- Though the Hare wasn’t quite at her best.

O, O, if the Hare wasn’t scared! She would have gone lippetty home if she’d dared. But she gave up the flight And kept well out of sight. O, wasn’t she scared!

The Zebra sneered when the Leopard appeared, And said with a satisfied smile: “In France they would not wear a dress with a spot And stripes are the latest style.”

O, surely the Zebra forgot That the Leopard’s unable to alter a spot; Her critical tone She’d have dropped if she’d known. She surely forgot!

The Ostrich was dressed in her very best With plumy wings outspread; But the Paradise Bird said: “How absurd! She hasn’t a plume for her head!”

O, O, it wasn’t polite! The Ostrich felt sure that she looked like a fright. She covered her head In a handy sand-bed Quite out of their sight.

The Chimpanzee sipped oolong tea And simpered and nibbled a sweet; And the Boa-constrictor would fain have kicked her, But she hadn’t the requisite feet.

O, O, she wasn’t complete! A twenty foot Boa without any feet; If she’d had twenty three What a kicker she’d be! She wasn’t complete!

An Orang-outang came out and sang Unembarrassed by the throng; And they cried encore with a terrible roar To her tropical, topical song.

SONG: In the jungle dim and dusky, A monkey lithe and husky Was hanging by his long prehensile tail; When he heard two men, preparing An iron cage, declaring That they’d learn the monkey lingo without fail.

O, O, wasn’t it fun! He unhooked his tail and he started to run; Every simian friend To the dim jungle’s end He told of the fun!

When at night the men were waiting Safe behind the iron grating, The monkeys came in crowds from every way, And although it was exciting, Yet the men inside were writing All the things they thought they heard the monkeys say.

O, O, this is a lark! Two men writing monkey talk down in the dark; If they only could know What we’re saying, O, O, Then ’twould be a lark!

An Elephant rose with a cold in her nose And she thought she would sing like a bird; But the song went astray on the wearisome way Through her trunk, and it never was heard.

O, O, she felt like a goose; With a song in her soul that she couldn’t turn loose; How she twisted and blew! But it couldn’t get through. O, what was the use!

A Crocodile with an afternoon smile Sang a song that made them quail. Her mouth opened wide and the sight inside Gave point to her musical tale.

SONG: A yacht came sailing up the Nile, Sail away, sail away, And the sight made every crocodile smile; Smile away, smile away, With a bubbly wake, through foam and spray, Through Egypt’s land, it sailed away. Alack-a-day!

The Sphinx was smiling all the while, Smile away, smile away, As the yacht came sailing up the Nile; Sail away, sail away, And she asked them a riddle that none could guess So she swamped the yacht in a wink or less. Alack-a-day!

Not a single person came to land; Alack-a-day! Alack-a-day! But crocodiles on every hand, Smile away, smile away, Said; “O, we wish that every day A yacht would happen along this way!” Alack-a-day!

And everyone stayed till the twilight shade Dimmed the tropical afternoon. And they all went away through the fading day, By the moon through the mild Monsoon.

O, O, it was a lark! They gossipped and stayed till the edge of the dark. And some were afraid And were sorry they’d stayed. O, wasn’t it dark!