BALLAD—IN THE REASONABLE ANIMALS. —A Wolf who had been a Lawyer

By roguery, 'tis true, I opulent grew, Just like any other professional sinner: An orphan, d'ye see, Would just wash down my tea, And a poor friendless widow would serve me for dinner.

I was, to be sure, Of the helpless and poor A guardian appointed to manage the pelf; And I manage'd it well, But how—says you—tell? Why I let them all starve, to take care of myself.

With these tricks I went on Till. faith sir, anon, A parcel of stupid, mean-spirited souls, As they narrowly watch'd me, Soon at my tricks catch'd me. And, in their own words, haul'd me over the coals.

In the pillory, that fate For rogues, soon or late, I stood, for the sport of a dissolute mob; 'Till my neck Master Ketch Was so eager to stretch, That I gave the thing up as a dangerous job.

Now a wolf—from their dams I steal plenty of lambs, Pamper'd high, and well fed—an insatiable glutton— In much the same sphere When a man, I move here, Make and break laws as pleasure, and kill my own mutton.

Then since, for their sport, No one here moves the court, Nor am I amenable to an employer, I shall ever prefer, With your leave, my good sir, The life of a wolf to the life of a lawyer.