Dickey Gossip

When I was a younker, I first was apprentic'd Unto a gay barber, so dapper and airy; I next was a carpenter, then turn'd a dentist, Then taylor, good Lord! then an apothecary; But for this trade or that, They all come as pat As they can; For shaving and tooth-drawing, Bleeding, cabbaging, and sawing, Dickey Gossip is the man.

Tho' taylor and dentist but aukwardly tether, In both the vocations I still have my savings; And two of my trades couple rarely together, For barber and carpenter both deal in shavings. So for this trade or that, They all come as pat, &c.

But blunders will happen in callings so various, I fancy they happen to some who are prouder: I once gave a patient whose health was precarious, A terrible dose of my best shaving powder. But no matter for that, My trades come as pat, &c.