The Crying and Laughing Song

When I wake with painful brow, Ere the cock begins to crow, Tossing, tumbling in my bed, Aching heart, and aching head, Pond'ring over human ills, Cruel bailiffs, taylors bills, Flush and pam thrown up at loo, When those sorrows strike my view, I cry — And to stop the gushing tear, Wipe it with the pillow bear.

But when sportive evening comes, Routs, ridottos, balls, and drums, Casinos here, festinos there, Mirth and pastime ev'ry where.

Seated by a sprightly lass, Smiling with the smiling glass; When these pleasures are my lot, Taylors, bailiffs, all forgot, I laugh, — Careless what may then befall, Thus I shake my sides at all.

Then again when I peruse, O'er my tea the morning news, Dismal tales of plundered houses, Wanton wives and cuckold spouses; When I read of money lent, At sixteen and half per cent. I cry, —

But if e'er the muffin's gone, Simp'ring enters honest John, 'Sir, Miss Lucy's at the door, 'Waiting in a chaise and four," Instant vanish all my cares, Swift I scamper down the stairs, And laugh, — So may this indulgent throng, Who now smiling grace my song, Never more cry oh! oh! la! But join with me in ha! ha! ha!