A Ballad Of Misfits

"Chacun son métier: Les vaches seront bien gardées." --LA FONTAINE.

With skill for doing this or that The Lord each man endows. Some men are best for pushing pens, And some for pushing plows; And oh, the many many more That should be tending cows! Chacun son métier: Les vaches bien gardées.

The ivory-headed serving maid Who poses as a "cook," She hath a very bovine brain, She hath a bovine look. Oh, prithee, lead her to the kine, Oh, prithee get the hook! Chacun son métier: Les vaches bien gardées.

The papering-and-painting gents Whose work is never done, Who mess around your house until You pine to pull a gun, Who take three mortal days to do What should be done in one;-- Chacun son métier: Les vaches bien gardées.

The pestilential "pianiste," The screechy singer too, The writer of the stupid book And of the dull review, The actor who is greatest when He takes his exit cue;-- Chacun son métier: Les vaches bien gardées.

If every one were set to do The task for which he's fit, The writer of these trifling lines Might also have to quit. At tending cows the undersigned Might make an awful hit. Chacun son métier: Les vaches bien gardées.