English poem
New Year Resolutions, 1924
by Herbert Beeman (1858–1944)
A member of the daily press Last Christmas hazarded a guess, In kindly fun, though mildly mocking, What some folks wanted in their stocking.
Our Bureau follows this idea, Resolving that to start the year, Each chairman should for his committee State what they'll do—so hence this ditty.
In order of the alphabet: ATTENDANCE first, "Now don't forget Presence assured, and less conjectures Would crowd our weekly Luncheon Lectures.
CABLES, correct, receipt from source, No repetitions or re-Morse. Without appeal to Home and Beauty The CUSTOMS crowd will do their "duty."
"Now Cinderella 'tis your cue To rub your eyes and find it's true," The Chairman of our GRAIN Committee Sees Montreal salute this city.
"LEGAL ADVISORY are we, Willing to serve on land or sea." MAILS, "quick despatch for all your letters, Oppose all departmental fetters."
PORT REGULATIONS, "Tete a tete With shipping to co-operate, RECEPTION. "We're for entertaining All folks to Foreign Trade pertaining."
Then TRADE and COMMERCE says, in short, "Give us your troubles, we'll report, Investigate for each petitioner, And entertain each Trade Commissioner."