“Like An Old Cow’S Tail”

When I was a youngster and lived on the farm It sickened my heart--did that morning alarm! When dad came along to the foot of the stairs And summoned me back to my duties and cares;

--Put all of my glorious visions to rout With “Breakfast is ready! LP h’ist out there, h’ist out!”

And when I came yawningly, sleepily down, My eyes “full of sticks” and my face all a-frown,

I got for a greeting this jocular hail,

“Wal, always behind like an old cow’s tail.”

I’ll own to you, neighbor, that work on the farm

Had features not wholly surrounded by charm. And when I am fashioning lyrical praise For matters bucolic of earlier days,

You’ll note that my lyre, sir, operates best When I tune up and sing of the blessings of rest.

I’ve stood in the stow-hole and “tread” on the load,

And waltzed with a bush scythe and worked on the road,

But somehow or other the language won’t spring

When prowess of muscle I venture to sing.

But when I am piping of “resting” or fun

Or lauding the time after chores are all done,

Why, somehow--why, blame it, as sure as you’re born,

I mentally feel that my trolley is on!

And a trolley, you know, would be certain to fail,

Unless’twas behind like an old cow’s tail.