He’d Had No Show

Joe Beall ’ud set upon a keg Down to the groc’ry store, an’ throw One leg right over t’other leg An’ swear he’d never had no show, “O, no,” said Joe, “Hain’t hed no show,” Then shif his quid to t’other jaw, An’ chaw, an’ chaw, an’ chaw, an’ chaw.

He said he got no start in life, Didn’t get no money from his dad, The washin’ took in by his wife Earned all the funds he ever had. “O, no,” said Joe, “Hain’t hed no show,” An’ then he’d look up at the clock An’ talk, an’ talk, an’ talk, an’ talk.

“I’ve waited twenty year—let’s see— Yes, twenty-four, an’ never struck, Altho’ I’ve sot roun’ patiently, The fust tarnation streak er luck, O, no,” said Joe, “Hain’t hed no show,” Then stuck like mucilage to the spot, An’ sot, an’ sot, an’ sot, an’ sot.

“I’ve come down regerler every day For twenty years to Piper’s store. I’ve sot here in a patient way, Say, hain’t I, Piper?” Piper swore. “I tell ye, Joe, Yer hain’t no show; Yer too dern patient”—ther hull raft Jest laffed, an’ laffed, an’ laffed, an’ laffed.