The Progress of Advice. a Common Case

Says Richard to Thomas (and seem'd half afraid) " I am thinking to marry thy mistress's maid; " Now, because Mrs. Lucy to thee is well known, " I will do't if thou bidd'st me, or let it alone.

" Nay, don't male a jest on't; 'tis no jest to me; " For 'faith I'm in earnest; so, prithee, be free. " I have no fault to find with the girl since I knew her, " But I'd have thy advice ere I tie myself to her."

Said Thomas to Richard, "To speak my opinion, " There is not such a bitch in King George's dominion; " And I firmly believe, if thou knew'st her as I do, " Thou wouldst chuse out a whipping-post first to be ty'd to.

" She's peevish, she's thievish, she's ugly, she's old, " And a liar, and a fool, and a slut, and a scold." Next day Richard hasten'd to church and was wed, And ere night had inform'd her what Thomas had said.