The English Woman'S Complaint

March, 1915

We want to ask Canadians To treat us not as fools; We cannot learn to play the game Until we learn the rules. We ask them not to try to take The mote from our eye, Nor say, till their own beam's removed, "No English need apply."

We try to be Canadians, It's 'ard we must confess, To drop our English adjectives And learn to say "I guess," We've chucked the bread and cheese and beer, We learning to eat pie, So please cut out that nasty slur, "No English need apply."

We came 'ere for our children's sake, (At 'ome they 'ad no show) Though 'tain't just what we thought it was, This land of frost and snow; But we never shrink at 'ardships, And we've come 'ere to stiy; So hustle down that bloomin' sign, "No English need apply."

We aren't no cooking experts, And couldn't make a blouse, For, till our 'usbands married us, We never 'ad kept 'ouse; And then we 'ad our families, But that's no reason why, As you should flash your dirty ads, "No English need apply."

At learning to economize Perhaps we're rather slow, But when you call for volunteers Our sons and 'usbands go; In all of your contingents Canadians are shy, But Colonel Sam 'as never said, "No English need apply."

When, steeped in military pride, The crazy Kaiser Bill Let loose his hell-directed hordes, To plunder, burn and kill, And British lads took up their guns For Freedom's cause to die, Brave, blood-stained Belgium didn't say "No English need apply."

Wherever danger blocks the way An Englishman has led, No storm-tossed sea, no foreign shore, But shelters England's dead; And when brave spirits took their flight To realms beyond the sky, We know Saint Peter didn't say "No English need apply."