The Wonderful Discovery

Never has India seen,— And ne'er will again, I wist,— As DR. PYRETIC SALINE, Such a great Geologist.

Where'er the Doctor may go Of wondrous discoveries we hear, He picks up a pebble—and lo!— Terebratulæ therein appear!

To a rock he has only to choose To give a magnetic squint, And petroleum's sure to ooze Out of some crevice in't!

Under his magical tread, Or before his magical nose, In the crag above his head, Or the ground around his toes,—

Coal is sure to abound, Where no one e'er saw it before, And, waiting for smelting, is found By the side of it, iron ore!

But the greatest of men may err: So did, as will shortly be seen, This great Discoverer, DR. PYRETIC SALINE.

To Khona Oopalabad The Doctor went one day,— Of course, ere he reached it, he had Discovered some things on the way.

Some lias fossils he found, (Sure signs that coal must exist) With Saurian footprints around, And Phacops in crystaline schist.

He pick'd up a Mammoth's leg Imbedded in petrified ice, And near it, an addled egg Which a Dodo had laid in gneiss.

With some Chara seeds in their pods, And some ancient man-skin shoes, And some fossil soap-stone gods Adored by primæval Hindoos.

A Stenorhynchus he met With a Ganoid lying beside, And a Psammodus neatly set In a Pleurotomaria's inside.

Then at length to the town he sought Th' illustrious Doctor came, And discovered a thing which he thought Would give him immortal fame.

Down the side of a cliff near the town He noticed there dribbled some Queer substance, blacky-brown, Which he deem'd petroleum.

Eureka! he cried. From the spot He penn'd an official note, But all men by this time had got Distrustful of what he wrote.

Enquiries were made. It was seen, When the stuff was put to the test, That DR. PYRETIC SALINE Had discovered a fine mare's nest.

For holes in the cliff were spied Where bat and pigeon abode, From whence, in an odorous tide, This wondrous "petroleum" flow'd.

Of this they analyzed some;— And discover'd—oh horrible!—that The Doctor's "petroleum" Was the DUNG OF PIGEON AND BAT!