SWITZERLAND

This atmosphere is pure ozone! To climb the hills you promptly start; Unless you happen to be prone To palpitations of the heart; In which case swarming up the Alps Brings on a bad attack of palps.

The nicest method is to stay Quite comfortably down below, And, from the steps of your chalet, Watch other people upwards go. Then you can buy an alpenstock, And scratch your name upon a rock.

Don't do fatiguing things which you Can pay another man to do. Let friends assume (they may be wrong), That you each year ascend Mong Blong. Some things you can pretend you've done, And climbing up the Alps is one.